Knowing When and How to Let Go

Change comes from putting aside old or outdated perceptions, memories, or beliefs and learning a new way to live with life experiences. It often takes giving something up. This is a universal principle and the reason for ceremonies and rituals. They help us to bridge the gap between the physical world which demands our attention and the spiritual one that quietly influences the material one.

My neighbor’s 80 year old father died on Friday evening. They called a family member with a car and carried the father’s body to the funeral home. They bought a coffin. Afterwards the members of the family washed and dressed the body and placed it in the coffin to be returned home. In this beach community of Honduras, it is the custom for the casket to sit open for viewing in the living room of the family home. This allows neighbors and friends to visit and say their final farewells.

The family prepared food, along with that donated by neighbors, for the guests. Everyone pulled together to help the family process through this transition. In the meanwhile, adult male members of the family went out to the cemetery to dig the grave and build a concrete crypt. All this effort of preparation is actually quite healing and offers neighbors and friends an opportunity to assist the deceased person one last time. When it is time to go to the cemetery the community walks behind a van or pickup that carries the coffin to its final home. 

The family rode with the body of their father. The coffin was placed on a prepared stand at the entrance of the cemetery for words and song. This were the family says its farewell. As they all gathered around the coffin with tear-filled eyes and bowed heads, the oldest daughter pushed forward with cries of anguish, throwing herself across the coffin. From deep within her chest came sobbing words of goodbye for her papa. I had heard of dramatic displays at funerals but this was the first time I had witnessed one. Her wailing, tears, and hanging to the coffin continued until the box was gently lowered into the ground. 

Her 3 children, faces wet and tear stained, were standing next to her. They all watched the closing of the crypt just before sunset. The woman wiped her eyes and the faces of her children. She told them that it was time to return to the house, take a shower and change their clothes. They needed to take care of grandmother. That was it. The woman knew she had done the best she knew how to do. She turned her back on the cemetery and walked with her children back to their home. It was time to look to the future.

hamster photo courtesy of New Yorker digital

cemetery photo from my personal collection

  

Applied Energy

When my husband and I moved to the Big Island of Hawaii, we bought a house nestled within an acre of jungle. On the edge of the house clearing stood an avocado tree of questionable age. Neither my husband nor I were fans of avocados and this tree was lanky and twisted from fighting for space in the sun. During our first 3 years, it had bore only a handful of fruit so we planned to cut it down sometime in the future.

Our house also had an above ground water catchment tank. It is a common practice in that area to collect rainwater for household cleaning. In times of drought, water must be bought by the truckload to fill the tanks. A truck holds 5,000-gallon or 2,500 gallons. If you order 5,000 gallons and only need 4,000, you pay for all and the driver dumps the remainder on your property. We had this happen once and the avocado tree received the excess gallons.

People familiar with growing avocados know the trees do not like soppy wet soil; it is sure death. Since we had no attachment to the tree, it was not a threat. However, friends that came by a few days later were devastated that we would allow a food-producing tree to die. They wanted to “save” the tree with blessing. Trying to explain our less than positive experience with tiny, hard avocados made no impression so  I gave them the go-ahead. They could have all the future fruit it bore. It seemed easier than trying to explain the fruitless history. 

The two women stood with their hands on the tree’s trunk. They spoke to the tree telling it how beautiful it was and how much they loved it and its fruit. They ended their 2-minute blessing by wishing the tree health and happiness. That year our tree gave us over 2-bushel s of beautiful and perfect avocados. 

I have been a student of subtle energy and energy healing for years before that event. I have used energy to help people and animals regain health. However, I had never thought to apply the idea to the tree. It was a wonderful lesson and I have since saved other trees from trauma, using the same process. It makes me wonder what else I am accepting as normal instead of offering healing. I find myself wondering why we, as a species, are not using the same healing force to shift the planet from hardship into harmony. If a tree can receive and respond, surely others of our own kind can. It only takes making a daily practice of thinking thoughts of kindness toward others; offering prayers of love and sincere wishes for well-being. What a beautiful example to teach and legacy to leave grandchildren and future inhabitants of our planet. 

A change in the way we look and things and applying positive energy will create a healthy planet.

Beads As Seeds of Change

In an earlier post I told a story of trying  to help some single mothers in my pueblo of Honduras. There was a time in my life when I was a single mom. After years of being self-employed  I did not qualify for aid, not even food stamps.Family was not helping. I think this is why I felt the need to try to help these two women who were struggling to survive. Not being able to care financially for their children is the greatest fear of single moms. They often see their only alternative is in finding another man to help them, but another man can bring more problems. 

I had grandiose plans of what I could do to assist these women, but the Universe was much wiser. The results that came in under my design were meager but were enough to confirm that I was headed in the right direction; I  was just taking the wrong mode of travel. As my little project evolved, greater than I could have ever expected, a second more personal project was birthed. This became my bead adventure. I was impressed to ask my friends and family to send me a bead as a birthday gift. I was going to create a necklace of oneness for my 65^th birthday. The process became a beautiful journey of self-awareness.  This bead adventure reconnected me to a time when the kindness of others  was the hand up I needed.

All that has occurred during this year has been  a journey under direction of a Higher Power. The two women I wanted to help have now become a program of help that is strengthening a community. As more women are being brought to my attention, I wondered where the money would come from to supply the help they needed. There are contributions from interested and caring people but it was also about that time that I felt impressed to share this beautiful crafting idea in a book. My birthday idea became a how-to book of crafting relationships with beads  along with a beautiful adventure for the soul. The idea and story of connection is creating a ripple; other women are making their own strands of connection. This heart connection has already extended to many different points around the globe and is connecting with my little beach community of El Porvenir. Here, royalties from the  book are supporting a growing Single Mom’s Project. What a beautiful gift of sharing.  Follow the Mother's Project   
Learn more:  www.wisdompathway.com

Giving Moms a Hand

Many years ago, I was a single unemployed mom. I was living in a tourist area during the off-season.  I had no job, financial support or help from family, but a church with a food pantry gave me enough for my children and I to survive until I began earning money.  I started a housecleaning service with the help of my 13-year old daughter. I have never felt badly scarred from that period, but I did receive some CEUs from the school of hard knocks. That period also left me with a tender place in my heart for single self-employed mothers.

Most mothers dream of having their children thrive. They feed that dream through their example. Since moving to the Central American country of Honduras, I have learned the dream of many single mothers is simply for their children to survive.  In my barrio, there are two single mothers, working their own small businesses. They manage to support themselves and their children. They even pay for their children’s schooling, but it is an existence living.  These women are no different from me. I found a way to realize the dream for my children and I felt these women might also realize theirs by improving their businesses. So I  started a Single Mother’s Hand-Up Project that helps create strong home based businesses for women in her area, deserted by their husbands.  

My vision for this little beach community is that it set a standard for the country. For women to find financial freedom through their own independent businesses, for their voices to be heard in government and their influence help the country rise above the poverty that incubates crime.

Follow the project on Face Book @

https://www.facebook.com/Gringos.n.Paradise?ref=hl

Read about other ways to make the world better @

http://www.amazon.com/The-Threaded-Gem-Adventure-connect/dp/1490920161